Is DIY Shower Cleaner That Actually Works Just a Hopeless Fantasy?

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

I have an addiction to shower spray. 

This is not the same as being addicted to shower cleaner, however, and I think it's important to separate the two.

Shower spray is simple. You finish bathing, then you grab a bottle and spray the heck out of the walls, tub, and fixtures. You do this in the hope of not having to actually grab a sponge and scrub.

Unfortunately, this is a very expensive, wasteful, and futile addiction, and just like any other addiction, the end results don't match up to the dream. No matter how diligently you spray, eventually the tub and shower walls need a full cleaning again.

To make matters worse, finding a good shower spray is just about impossible during this pandemic. When I go to the store - any store - I have a choice of a) a store brand, or b) another store brand. 

While I swear by many of those for my staple supplies, shower spray is not one of them. I'm extraordinarily picky, because I don't want to waste any effort on cleaning any more than necessary. That goes double for actual shower cleaner!

I HATE cleaning!

Look at those gross, white, vertical
streaks on the wall!

Back when I had a tiled shower, it wasn't so bad. Tile is actually pretty simple to clean, and that includes the grout. But these apartment showers with spray-on resurfacing work?

They never come clean, regardless of what I use. My shower cleaning job has become an incredible hassle, ands the results of this torturous labor are subpar.

I know I'm not alone in this. 

Having worked apartment maintenance, I've seen what these showers look like when people move out after only 2-3 years, and it's not pretty. I also want to point out to you, if you're having issues with your own shower cleaning efforts, that it's most likely not entirely your fault. 

The resurfacing job done on most apartment showers in between moves is very nice to look at, but hard to keep clean. Companies give out a long list of what not to do when you clean them, but little  advice on how to clean them properly.

If you slack off, you're toast. It's that simple. Naturally, I couldn't effectively clean the shower for a few weeks, due to pregnancy and post-birth healing, so I ended up with a disaster zone. The right cleaner, however, could change everything.

That means I'm on the hunt, again. I want a shower cleaner that:

1. Has earth friendly ingredients
2. Is easy to make
3. Uses few ingredients
4. Doesn't cost a fortune
5. Works well enough to make me stop whining.

I'm not sure this exists. Especially that last part. I refuse to believe a working shower cleaner is just a fantasy, however, so let's take a look at the requirements.

1. It's earth friendly.

Keep in mind, earth friendly and natural are not the same thing. Just because something is man-made, doesn't make it a terrible choice. I may be green, but I'm not crazy! 

2. It's easy to make.

This means that I'm not going to hunt down something that requires 3 different cooking methods and 5 hours to create. It needs to be done in under an hour, and not need a chemistry degree to accomplish.

Image by  Gerhard G.  from Pixabay

3. There are few ingredients in the recipe.

By few, I mean that it contains no more than 7 ingredients. Anything more is pushing things too far, and feels like a waste. 3-5 ingredients is ideal.

4. It needs to be cheap.

This needs to cost as much as, or less than, a large amount of shower spray.

5. It needs to produce a relatively pain-free cleaning experience.

This is done to kick a shower spray habit, so it needs to be something that I won't balk at doing. It must take a short amount of time to complete, and it needs to use only a little elbow grease.

Can this be accomplished?

I'm hopeful, but unsure. I succeeded when I went on my search for a DIY dishwasher detergent, and this success occurred after only one failure. This means that a shower cleaner that fits these specifications may exist. 

Have you discovered a great recipe for one? Leave us some suggestions in the comments, and I'll be sure to try them!